The Beat Nation

symphony stirs your soul

The Underground Rock Scene of the 80s and the 90s

August 14, 2021
Vaishali Adwant

Two extremes in the rock genre began in the 80’s following the 90’s rock scene until pop genre ruled the charts with Britney Spears, Christina Auguliera, and Robin Williams, and the ilk. The freedom of expression through the rock music genre saw its way beyond the forbidden, singing about obnoxious fantasies, dark themes, and sadness. Nirvana makes Kurt Cobain the most celebrated discography of depression, Lithium, and all everything that is wrong in the world only to make you think and ponder why were these Punk grunge, and rock artists even famous when their compositions sounded amateurish with guitar and synth in the background. You could come up with a tune sound much better than Cobian or Bowie.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

My blog is scared to me as is music, art, and creativity. Therefore, I am going to flag the gory truths of what influenced the underground ’80s and ’90s rock scene which was majorly influenced by occultists. When you go down in the history and dig deeper, you will only find darkness in the name of ’80s underground rock, punk, and grunge music.

It makes you wonder if The Beatles, especially their lead vocalist, John Lennon was making a facade of spirituality turning back to his addiction and violence which defy the essence of spirituality. At least, his lyrics were not as blashphemous as other grunge and punk artists who glorified darkness and misanthropy. That is nothing to sing and dance about, when your lyrics describe hideous and darkness that does not take the human race to a higher realm, you probably need to question your choices, what you are listening to.

The ’80s accepted novelty in any form ushered from the conservative and retro ’70s era. Masses were not spiritually aware and made a god of Kurt Cobian who was influenced by an occultist. Unlike today where most can tell good from evil, the ’80s underground scene was a motley of experiments with faith, beliefs, ideologies, and music.

Today you might not want to sit through a few seconds of the ’80s punk and grunge rock music that had nothing motivational to give to the world through music. The iconic David Bowie was a known occultist whose music and lyrics of a few tracks could make you wonder how was he accepted as an influential music icon. The underground scene of rock was sacrilegious, distasteful making you wonder why was angst, pain, and immorality a music genre. It’s not music anymore, it’s a siren song, nothing good for your ears, mind, heart, and the soul.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Punk, Hard Rock, And Metalcore

Hard rock and metal entered the scene with electric guitars, high octane compositions making rock ballads and rock and roll take a back seat. The lyrics got caustic, deriding ideologies that didn’t ring a bell with the artists. Unlike The Beatles, Elvis Presley, and the ilk, they didn’t have optimism and hope to offer to the world creating a whirlpool of Prozac-nation of those who binged on depression. Nirvana’s lead vocalist Kurt Cobian had a tragic death, but unlike John Lennon, he was not a spiritual artist who wanted peace in the world. His music and lyrics spewed misanthropy, which makes me wonder why was he an influential icon in the grunge scene. Wouldn’t you want to tell the world to love each other and be compassionate through music? Cobain’s ideologies were rather screwed and twisted for an artist and a musician.

The typical punk sub genres were particularly disturbing without a rhyme or meaning you couldn’t resonate with in your day-to-day life or even give it a thought. They didn’t make you think because their intent was to rebel fundamental human values for artistic expression or glorify darkness of the other worlds that defy spiritual faith. Would you still listen to proto-glam-Oi! Punk? I don’t think so! The art and music genre died its natural death opening avenues to newer rock, punk, and metal portmanteaus like U2, Metallica, Bon Jovi, AC/DC, Aerosmith, Guns And Roses, while still celebrating The Rolling Stones, The Smiths, and more.

What is saddening to see is the treatment of music in the ’80s rock and roll scene that seems to have influences from Occultists of that time. ‘ Doing as you please’ was a new thought in the ’80s that was urshered into the ’80s after a conservative ’60s and ’70s that was afraid to adopt novel ideologies and lacked spiritual awareness like we do today to tell good from evil.

It was the age of experiment with music, ideologies, and masses accepted anything that seemed ‘cool’ and ‘unheard of’ without a conscious evaluation. Today you cannot sit through for a few seconds through most of the punk and grunge bands that sang blasphemy making a mockery or deriding spiritual faith. The lyrics stonewalled the existence of virtues and higher ideals, which is just sad for the artists as well as those who seem to love the noise and give it a name of punk and hard rock.

Evolution Of Underground ’80s Rock Sub Cultures

The underground rock scene evolved from the cult punk rock to hard and metalcore. The Blink182, Audioslave, Breaking Benjamin, Lynyrd Skynyrd, etc sang about the effect of expectations, dysfunctional and broken families, and love themes that were more realistic than romaticized. The pop and synth punk was bearable without the noisy compositions and the profane lyrics. The punk scene of the ’80s pretty much celebrated profanity making you worry about the taste in music and its effect on your psyche.

With pop punk and synth portmanteaus, the profanity was toned down in this genre esthetic. Melodic death metal and the reign of Swedish rock metal bands mixed growling, dark lyrics, with symphonies. Good to the ears, but not to the soul if you care what they are singing about.

It’s sad to see how creative arts like film making, music, or any form of visual arts are used to depict morbid theories and ideologies that defy sacredness and spirituality in the name of art just because art is a discipline that lets you express yourself without bias or restriction; and these are the moribund artists who have abused the essence of art as a platform to invite deviousness in a realm that celebrates love, compassion, joy, togetherness, and oneness of the universe.

As a young adult or teen you wouldn’t be able to see the repurcurssions of this gory music, but I think the underground rock scene of ’80s messed up too many younger minds introducing their impressionable minds to ghoulish ideologies. You do not want to be a messed up teen growing into an adult with skewed ideologies that stop you from seeing the beauty of life and the purpose of mankind. The cult that started in the ’80s is a testimony of making a conscious choice of the kind of music you listen to because it affects your subconscious mind. So, make a good choice that brings good feelings, hope, encouragement, and optimism.

Alternative Rock And Metal From The ’90s

You could say the ’80s was a dark era influenced not by spirituality but darkness and was transforming for good entering the ’90s where the pop genre rules and alternative rock and metal bands brought a sense of freshness expressing myraid emotions through music breaking the conventions of how music was made and composed.

Bush, Chumbawamba, Duran Duran, Coldplay, Vertical Horizon, Oasis, Red Hot Chillie Peppers, Goo Goo Dolls, Snowpatrol, and many more. The American rock bands had more negativity and pessimism which completely defied the ideologies and music of Brit Rock bands like Travis, Suede, Maniac Street Preachers, etc. Rock music has evolved since the ’80s and is no more about Satanic ideologies and celebrates individualism and free-spirited gumption.

A Cup Of Coffee, Light Drizzling, Good Book, And Travis Discography

August 20, 2020
Vaishali Adwant

It’s early morning, you have a cup of freshly brewed coffee, and Travis playing in the background to set an unhurried pace. Dewy-eyed songs that celebrate  moments of life through lyrics, rhythm, and composition, paved its way for a newer version of Brit rock. There is not a feel of rebellion or the will to make a change. The Invisible Band sings about love, emotions and complications in relations, self-doubt, self-denial, and myriad emotions you could feel about yourself and the person you love. The beauty of flouncing through knotted feelings of your beloved composed from lamenting sonatas of the subconscious makes everyday life welcoming or maybe not.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Why Does It Always Rain On Me

I love Travis because they are sing about real things we experience in life without the defense of internationalization. They are not trying to make a point or stay blissfully optimistic singing about all nice stuff about life. The moments of desolation of your life could still feel bearable and put a smile on your face because you can relate to Why Does It Always Rain On Me? Didn’t you ever feel out of place just like the protagonist in this song? Life is not all sunshine. You can sing about the grey shades without feeling intense as you let go off those painful moments.

Sing Even When There Is No Hope

Sing has always been my favorite. Reminds me of my teen days, the time that decided that rock genre is forever what I relate to. You could be 70 and not find ‘Sing’ a song from the days of yonder. Your emotions mature as you grow listening to Travis. In your journeys, pass times, happy, and sad times, they are with you, soothing you. Turn is about changing yourself for better.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Re-Offender From The Land That People Forgot

Re-offender is what most of us go through in relations and how we get fooled being abused emotionally over and over in the name of love. Sometimes, the offender is not even sorry, and you pick up pieces of your broken spirit and soul and compel yourself to love life, because you tell yourself, your life is more precious than all the hurt and pain caused. Life is precious enough to learn to find meaning regardless of how bruised you have been in the name of love and everything else.

Write To Reach You

When you love someone so much, logic overrides emotions no matter how things go wrong so you Write To Reach You. We all have had these moments where you are still in love even though there is no logical reason to do with all the chaos and complications. Maybe because something about being in love with the person felt so good, it is waiting to overlook all the wrongs despite feeling hopeless. We all have been there, haven’t we?

An adorable song about seeing your newborn wishing there were more rainbows than sunshine and rains. My eyes is the best song about welcoming your newborn into this world. They write about political situations across the world with The Beautiful Occupation and how we can’t do much about it. Side because s*** happens and we can sing about it and not let it bother us. I love this song because they write about being happy with what you have because life is a circle and all of us experience same emotions which makes us all equal.

Love Will Come Through

Love Will Come Through when you feel dreaded of loving someone knowing not what consequences may come or where it may lead you. Love will come through, its just waiting for you!And hours go by listening to the idyllic melodic fete of Travis.

Shower Yourself Some Pixie Dust With The Magical Brit Rock-Pop Bands

September 7, 2019
Vaishali Adwant

Pride Of Manchester - The Top 100 Manchester Bands

image source

Could Hurt And Pain Truly Stunt You?

Have Defamation And Failures Been The Bolt From The Blue?

Would You Open Up Your Soul To Explore The New?

Again Feel Fresh As a Dew?

Pour Some Pixie Dust On You…and Binge on To Brit Rock Melodies To Eternity…

Transitioning through the slim veil of emotional defence to emotional freedom, everything inside you is changing with a rhythm of Keanes’ Everybody’ Changing, not necessarily a heartbreak, or hurt painful enough to stunt you, but pain, hurtful enough to make you evolve, love yourself not out of motive but wanting to experience life because you have been showed with the pixie dust of Brit Rock bands reminding you the meaning of love, material, spirituality, relations, through the song and lyrics of The Beatles, Keane, Love Bites and Hysteria of Def Leppard, or maybe if you are musically living your daemons singing Ozzy Ozbourne, the choice is yours, or may be climb up the wonder-wall of Oasis.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Transcendental Alternative Rock

Feel the universe within with Kulashaker’s Govinda, or sing to eternity humming the discography of The Rolling Stones. If love for material is all left in you, let music remind you the priceless side to life Brit Rock bands make you fathom with music tapes-tried with lyrics. Turn on the playlist like a good habit, listening to the motley gumption from Travis celebrating with Sing, knowing Love Will Come Through, and feel Undone With Duran Duran when your heart wants to be nothing but the melodist composing your own tune and rhythm of life.

Ideologies, Alternative Rock Bands, Brit Rock

Love, lost in the contest of life, lost and found in music, art, and finer artefacts, we have forgotten we need love, because we are not mortal machines covered with lacy doily, saying the world all is pretty carrying a heart turned stone-cold and frozen. Let music melt you, make you shed some tears of joy without relevance or meaning…coz just being is priceless.

You do have a new place to go in your wandering mind and soul, endlessly searching for new avenues, older paths revisited with newer thoughts and emotions, and gumption where the past does not want to look dreary, not shed a tear of regret because music and art sojourns you through time back and forth, and makes everything magical.

Universal Cultural Impact Of 80s New Wave British Rock Bands

August 23, 2019
Vaishali Adwant

The Beatles pioneered the rock scene in London in the 60’s and created a cultural impact since the 70’s through the 80’s unto eternity. They evinced through their music and lyrics of what true rock culture and the essence of music is;  about individualism, free-thinking, liberated ideologies, and universal love. While most of the American rock bands sang about intense negative experiences, emotions, and thoughts with no subtlety, The Brit rock bands of 80’s altered the entire rock scene and formed a portmanteau of new wave rock music that sang about a motley of emotions to their depth.

The Beatles had a cultural impact worldwide asking for peace and transcending through higher realms of spirituality evolving every aspect of emotion with realistic redolence. The Beatles sang about living in the past memories of someone you loved, Hey Jude is a love song dedicated to John Lennon and Yoko’s relationship, Dear Prudence about the hope of a sunny new day, and so forth. The new wave Brit rock bands explored emotions, ideologies, and feelings with prudence and harmony. There is expressionism, openness that people loved to hear and sing about in their music and lyrics. There is a reason you can still relate to what The Beatles and most of the Brit rock bands sang about.

The Pink Floyd broke all the conventions and orthodoxies of then puritan British era and though beyond confirming education, spoke about many things that matter in life with fearless openness to change the ideologies of people for good. Music opens your soul to real wisdom unbounded and limitless. The music of Brit rock lets you care less about what the society has to say or think and let you be yourself thinking originally, processing every idea to reach a higher realm.

But not everyone in the world is looking for a higher realm, and that’s alright as long as you find peace in what you do and do good for yourself and others, your reach is good enough. Pink Floyd might have not always sung about ideologies and emotional dioramas with a rebellious perspective, but they did put thought in their lyrics and make the world sing along with them.

They influenced the world with original perspectives which the world needed to sing about, and dwell into. Nirvana sadly contradicted the essence of the name of their band and sang about depressive things in the world which unfortunately lead to the sad demise of Kurt Cobain. Well, you can always choose the genre of rock music depending on your mood.

Duran Duran ushered novelty in the Brit rock scene and paved a way for a blend of new wave, synth pop, and rock and harmonised intensity and rebellion of most of the American rock bands. You get a softer and symphonic genre of rock with Duran Duran, my personal and all time favourite, though there is always an endless favourite playlist in music, Duran Duran sings inside my soul. From Elvis Presley’s newfangled rock-n-roll to the sojourn of The Beatles and the new wave genre of Duran Duran, Brit rock evolved in styles, musical renditions, emotional expressionism, leaving behind the puritan era and breaking norms for better thoughts and emotional freedom.

These legends give you a reason to think and feel deeper emotions, and different perspectives through music. Ideologies which germinated through them and set a norm for eras to evolve and take a refuge in them.

 

 

The Cultural Impact Of 80s New Wave British Rock Bands

August 23, 2019
Vaishali Adwant

image source

The Beatles pioneered the rock scene in London in the 60’s and created a cultural impact since the 70’s through the 80’s unto eternity. They evinced through their music and lyrics of what true rock culture and the essence of music is;  about individualism, free-thinking, liberated ideologies, and universal love. While most of the American rock bands sang about intense negative experiences, emotions, and thoughts with no subtlety, The Brit rock bands of 80’s altered the entire rock scene and formed a portmanteau of new wave rock music that sang about a motley of emotions to their depth.

The Beatles Universal Cultural Impact Want For World Peace

The Beatles had a cultural impact worldwide asking for peace and transcending through higher realms of spirituality evolving every aspect of emotion with realistic redolence. The Beatles sang about living in the past memories of someone you loved, Hey Jude is a love song dedicated to John Lennon and Yoko’s relationship, Dear Prudence about the hope of a sunny new day, and so forth. The new wave Brit rock bands explored emotions, ideologies, and feelings with prudence and harmony. There is expressionism, openness that people loved to hear and sing about in their music and lyrics. There is a reason you can still relate to what The Beatles and most of the Brit rock bands sang about.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Pink Floyd Defied Britain’s Puritanism

The Pink Floyd broke all the conventions and orthodoxies of then puritan British era and though beyond confirming education, spoke about many things that matter in life with fearless openness to change the ideologies of people for good. Music opens your soul to real wisdom unbounded and limitless. The music of Brit rock lets you care less about what the society has to say or think and let you be yourself thinking originally, processing every idea to reach a higher realm.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

But not everyone in the world is looking for a higher realm, and that’s alright as long as you find peace in what you do and do good for yourself and others, your reach is good enough. Pink Floyd might have not always sung about ideologies and emotional dioramas with a rebellious perspective, but they did put thought in their lyrics and make the world sing along with them.

They influenced the world with original perspectives which the world needed to sing about, and dwell into. Nirvana sadly contradicted the essence of the name of their band and sang about depressive things in the world which unfortunately lead to the sad demise of Kurt Cobain. Well, you can always choose the genre of rock music depending on your mood.

Evolution of Alternative Rock

Duran Duran ushered novelty in the Brit rock scene and paved a way for a blend of new wave, synth pop, and rock and harmonised intensity and rebellion of most of the American rock bands. You get a softer and symphonic genre of rock with Duran Duran, my personal and all time favourite, though there is always an endless favourite playlist in music, Duran Duran sings inside my soul. From Elvis Presley’s newfangled rock-n-roll to the sojourn of The Beatles and the new wave genre of Duran Duran, Brit rock evolved in styles, musical renditions, emotional expressionism, leaving behind the puritan era and breaking norms for better thoughts and emotional freedom.

These legends give you a reason to think and feel deeper emotions, and different perspectives through music. Ideologies which germinated through them and set a norm for eras to evolve and take a refuge in them.

Free-Spirited Individualism Of Alternative Rock And Sub-Genres

August 18, 2019
Vaishali Adwant

Image result for alternative rock

What is your worldly view? 

Is the sin of being too real your sinew?

Alternative rock rings the bell of your soul?

You are so undone, 

Originality is the religion you dole?

Show your flaws without fear…

Is your inner self, you wish to hear?

Are you too solemn to want to be pretty? Seeking your higher self through the no-nonsense, no-bullshit persona within the music and lyrics of Alternative rock and sub-rock genres. Is your nirvana searching for a deeper meaning? Willing to swim across the tides of tricksters, beguilers, and dissemblers? Evolving from the poltergeist chains of grunge rock as a stereotypical teen to sublime emotions of the classic rock ballads. A musical genre, a lifeline your heart beats to, living under its belly vicariously, to germinate into an eternal free spirit.

As depressed as Kurt Cobian relating to Nirvana, backstroking through identity crisis as a teen and taking penance in rebel of Linkin Park, mellowness of Bryan Adams, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, through the discography of Lynard Sknyard, Pearl Jam, and the list goes on.

When Pink Floyd overthrows conventional education, The Beatles pave a way for eternity exploring thoughts and emotions, Def Leppard singing a motley of meaningful things in life we experience. There is always more to love than sweetness and beautiful feelings. Love is the toughest thing to deal with when its real, coz love lets you discover your inner daemons and gives you strength to fight them off, because you want to love to the highest purity, breaking away all the flakiness.

Unbound to the ways of the world, living by your imperfections, flaws, gumption, learning and unlearning, Alternative rock is a wide spectrum of thoughts and emotions in poetry and lyrics with upbeat music score that ignites the realm within you. Discover yourself over and again in the musical fete of rock genres with a bang that screams to say anything but unreal.

For those who dare to wear vulnerabilities on their sleeve, and get up and go with a vastness in your soul, because you know that being unbound is your journey through different dimensions. Beyond the veil of superstitions, false faith, conditioned notions, lays a realm, the penultimate opening up your inner self destroying misleading ideologies, coz everything in life is too real to experience and keep evolving.

 

Free-Spirited Individualism Of Alternative Rock Bands

August 18, 2019
Vaishali Adwant

Image result for alternative rock

What is your worldly view? 

Is the sin of being too real your sinew?

Alternative rock rings the bell of your soul?

You are so undone, 

Originality is the religion you dole?

Show your flaws without fear…

Is your inner self, you wish to hear?

The evolution and the realm of the alternative rock bands gave the world a new music genre and ideologies to ruminate about. Are you too solemn to want to be pretty? Seeking your higher self through the no-nonsense, no-bullshit persona within the music and lyrics of Alternative rock and sub-rock genres. Is your nirvana searching for a deeper meaning? Willing to swim across the tides of tricksters, beguilers, and dissemblers? Evolving from the poltergeist chains of grunge rock as a stereotypical teen to sublime emotions of the classic rock ballads. A musical genre, a lifeline your heart beats to, living under its belly vicariously, to germinate into an eternal free spirit.

From Grunge To Alternative Rock

As depressed as Kurt Cobian relating to Nirvana, backstroking through identity crisis as a teen and taking penance in rebel of Linkin Park, mellowness of Bryan Adams, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, through the discography of Lynard Sknyard, Pearl Jam, and the list goes on.

When Pink Floyd overthrows conventional education, The Beatles pave a way for eternity exploring thoughts and emotions, Def Leppard singing a motley of meaningful things in life we experience. There is always more to love than sweetness and beautiful feelings. Love is the toughest thing to deal with when its real, coz love lets you discover your inner daemons and gives you strength to fight them off, because you want to love to the highest purity, breaking away all the flakiness.

https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-7010587022689839 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Free-spirited Individualism And Alternative Rock

Unbound to the ways of the world, living by your imperfections, flaws, gumption, learning and unlearning, Alternative rock is a wide spectrum of thoughts and emotions in poetry and lyrics with upbeat music score that ignites the realm within you. Discover yourself over and again in the musical fete of rock genres with a bang that screams to say anything but unreal.

For those who dare to wear vulnerabilities on their sleeve, and get up and go with a vastness in your soul, because you know that being unbound is your journey through different dimensions. Beyond the veil of superstitions, false faith, conditioned notions, lays a realm, the penultimate opening up your inner self destroying misleading ideologies, coz everything in life is too real to experience and keep evolving.

Rock Versions of National Anthem For the Young and Dynamic India

June 5, 2018
Vaishali Adwant

National Anthem’s original tune and intent melts your heart, and evokes patriotism no matter in which part of the world you have settled. A.R Rahman came up with his version of Vande Mataram a few years back. The best part of the new era musicians is they explore and come up with tunes and compositions with oomph and dynamism. That is what the rock versions of National Anthem do to you, raise your energy and vibration, and beckon your attention into your very identity and the soil you were born into.

We yap about government and politics mindlessly, and pass away time, without giving a forethought about change starts with us, and our will to bring transformation within. The metal version of National Anthem is bombastic and deep. It connects you with a feeling of solidarity, and the fact that what we are regardless of the urbanisation is still not lost and retained ubiquitously as a reminder of times that people forgot.

Struggle and devotion were divine virtues that time of digital world has forgot. Rock and metal versions of National Anthem delineates a time and values through wonderful renditions and compositions that we still inherit the virtues of this land and through our arms open for a revolution that brings a better change in the very thought of the citizens to open up and explore and yet not forget who we are originally and where we belong.

We as a diverse culture bring variety and traditions in its utmost sweetness and welcome ethnicity from any dimension to expand our consciousness. We as a country are a mass of consciousness and not populace alone. When you hear the scared tunes of National Anthem in rock and metal versions, the folksy inside you aligns with the earnestness of what progress in thought and consciousness.

Enjoy this wonderful version of our National Anthem

 

Music Has Been My Spiritual Rebirth

November 15, 2017
Vaishali Adwant

Not once in my life did I ever think, because it is hard to imagine for someone like me, that there will be a prolonged stage of inactivity in the cosmos of creativity because that is what my world is about.

For the longest period of time, I didn’t understand the blankness, with moments of epiphany frailed in letting me know who I really was, with flashes of memories. I was sinking deep into the never-never land. I didn’t have a solution to come out of that state of blankness and I thought, let’s just end this burden of life…being so vegetative in my state. The unpredictability through all of this was such a struggle and battling the outside noise, which pretty much grew into a hostile uproar, trying to shut and eclipse the ‘Real Me.’
I would look blankly at my 15-year-old gb&a acoustic guitar and only play  ‘ode to joy’ at times and get propelled back into the black hole of nothingness, sitting there like time wouldn’t just pass.
Deep down in my subconscious mind, something was still awake through all of this. To the outside world, my life seemed bizarre, because nobody has the time to run deep, it only takes love to do that to someone.
That little-awakened something, stayed awakened all the time, and that was what made me want to explore like I used to, going back and forth on this madness through its nothingness. I wouldn’t do any of my artworks over a long period of time. Holding a HB pencil for more than 5 minutes hurt something in my spirit and I  have half-made sketches and write-ups. so, I understood, my spirit is not ready for this, and music is what I binged on to, and feel good. For the longest of time, after experiencing blankness, I felt good. I felt.
It’s been a few months, no relapses. Maybe moments of mood swings, but no relapses what so ever. The miracle is I no more seem to enjoy death metal music, or sad, disturbing lyrics and can no more stand the very sound of them. I feel sad for Linkin Park, if only he had some spiritual help through his darkness, he’d live longer.
I understand his journey and every bit of melancholy and separateness, but I could battle it out, and wish he could too. I do not feel sad though I do reflect on too many things that I had no choice but deal with. I only wish people listen to some good music and see the better side of everything, and I did the same.
I do not have a reason to feel sorry for myself. I never did. My scathing experiences only encouraged me to be stronger than ever and not lose sight of all the good that God has given me and my life. I just cannot listen to sad music anymore. I have grown out of all the darkness surrounding me,,,because my focus has always been on that one ray of light, and I just kept looking at it till I got there.
I have been amongst those few ppl who had a gumption my true calling pretty early on in my life.
As a kid, being the studios one, one of the top rankers in my class, I was certain that films, designing, and music is what I am going to do and I did pursue regardless of conformist opposition, and all the evil that I have battled.

Art and music feed my soul like nothing else do through everything and nothingness. 

Blog at WordPress.com.